MAGGOTS! Pukes! Pieces of amphibian shit! Your country needs you! My British Army recruitment campaign might need a bit of finessing, I’ll concede, but it has potential, don’t you think?
It’s nice to start the new year with optimism, and a cynicism-free clean slate. Nobody plans to get bogged down in negativity before Twelfth Night. There’s something tragically incongruous about swearing at a screen while fairy lights twinkle gently in the background.
Of course, staying away from the internet helps…
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Published in The National on January 4 2019.